The Mouse and Motorcycle was one of my favorite books growing up. Ralph was such a cool little mouse, and I never thought I had anything against mice.
That is until one day a few weeks ago that I went into my back room to get some Clif Bars before a ride. I reached my hand into the box and pulled out this.
Realizing some little creeper had been crawling around in our spare room (i.e. bike room) didn't exactly make me happy. But I didn't really think much of it, and seeled up my food containers better.
A few weeks in December go by. I was taking off season, so we closed off the bike room to save on heat. Last week, alas, off-season was over, and I was getting ready to do a Wattbike workout one day, so open the door to the bike room.... only to discover some unsettling things.
Number 1: This mouse apparently not only has an affinity for CLIFBars, but also CLIF Gels and Organic CLIF Energy Food. This whole box was completely gone. Not one drop of syrup or anything was left... it had been licked clean. Merry Christmas little mouse -- you must have been swimming in delight!
Number 2: There were mysterious shreddings all over the carpet. We couldn't really figure out what this was, that is, until....
Number 3: I got on my Wattbike to start my workout, only to find the pedals weren't quite turning as expected. Looking at the cranks - there were pipe cleaners peeping out. $%@#&!. This little mouse had made a nice little nest inside my Wattbike. Don't mind you, that there were tons of nice cardboard wheel boxes in the corner, with some warm packing materials that could be gnawed upon. But, no, apparently, this mouse was too good for cardboard homes. Yes, this super smart mouse - p/b organic CLIF products - needed to have a luxury mansion inside of a Wattbike.
Now, taking apart a Wattbike is no easy task, so I started with the easiest part - removing the seatpost. You cannot see what I saw when I removed the seatpost... but please imagine two little beedy mouse eyes staring up at me. I did what any grown person would do.... I screamed and ran away. At this point in the mouse & Wattbike puzzle... my husband and I think this little mouse is so fat that it is now stuck in the Wattbike.
"Pour some poison down there!" That is my gut instinct. However, my husband is much nicer person than me, and makes this little contraption hoping the mouse can get out. A creative use of tire liners, I must say. However, the mouse is apparently not stuck... and it has no intention of leaving it's happy little home.
At this point, I realize I must get rid of the mouse nest.... This required a trip to the store for a longer phillips screw driver. I begin pulling out the mouse nest. I am completely astonished as to, not only what I find... but how on earth this mouse managed to get all this into the Wattbike in the first place!
Then I see a tail move and I scream and run away... but that isn't before I manage to get all this out:
-2 medium sized towels
-a countless number of pipecleaners
-4 latex gloves
-some used packing tape
-a 2mm allen wrench ?!?!?!
....Yeah, that last one really through me for a loop too. All of it (of course) smelt like mouse pee, which is nasty odor, if you don't know.
Now, we are in a stand-off with the mouse. But, if I've learned one thing from this mouse... it is do not underestimate it. It is super smart. Go organic - it works, apparently. The mouse has no reason to stay inside his Wattbike home at night, but is trapped inside the backroom because it is too fat to get out however it got in. The whole room at this point has been cleaned out... save for some mouse traps. This feels like a standoff - only fitting for an East Oakland mouse.
The next few nights go like this:
10:30pm: mouse is gnawing at the door, trying to make a getaway
1:00am: mouse is gnawing at the door, trying to make a getaway
2:00am: mouse is gnawing at the door, trying to make a getaway.
Needless to say, this kept me up for a few nights straight.... In the morning, we find that mouse traps go off..... but the mouse is so bloody smart from all that organic CLIF food, it can apparently get the food off the mouse trap, without getting trapped... He licks the peanut butter off the poison version of the mouse bait... but doesn't actually eat the poison tablet. That mouse has eaten enough CLIF food for probably a month... so starving him out is going to take awhile. But I figure it is just time, as the mouse is isolated in that room, and eventually must eat the bait.
But, then, the other day, we find that the mouse somehow got out! And is now in the kitchen. It must have gnawed an opening big enough in the corner of the door. This is feeling more and more like Shawshank Redemption, and I am begin to wonder who the hero of the story is... me or the mouse.
I sadly have no ending to this story, as this mouse is still setting off mouse traps all over the place, but never dying. Our stray cat, Leopold, won't step foot in our house... And so, this is bad ending to this blog post. I was really hoping to conclude this post with a picture of my dead mouse.... but we don't always get what we want....
--UPDATE-- (Approximately 2 weeks from the unearthing of the Wattbike mouse nest)
At 11:34 a.m. January 19, 2016, I found this in the corner of the dining room.
RIP. The little mouse - which is clearly no so little at all - finally ate the poison blocks. And although this mouse is still a little shit, I sure am thankful he was polite enough to take his last breath in the corner of our living room and not in some secure nook & cranny and create a whole smelly mess that we wouldn't unearth until March.
The mouse died, really, just in time, as yesterday I got a shippment of all new Clif products. I couldn't help but stack up some boxes of food next to this dead mouse that he will never get to eat.
Yes, I realize that was a pretty cold hearted photo of me to take.... especially the notecard sign I added.... but, I am not totally cruel and I did lay this mouse rest just where he would have wanted.
And so that concludes the story of the mouse and the wattbike. I guess the only other thing I have to say is.... damn, that is a long tail.